Many relationships founder on the rocks of unhelpful habits John Assaraf (of The Secret fame) explains why it is so difficult to change these habits that get hardwired in our brains.We are genetically conditioned to do this, but we can break these patterns by having the right knowledge and using it in the right order.

John also explains how meditation can help with this process and how it takes up to 90 to completely change these habits, but it can be done!

This is why I urge couples whose marriages may be breaking down, to spend 90 days working with new knowledge and skills which can transform their relationship.

Watch out for the launch of Relationship Academy bringing you all the knowledge and information you need to transform your relationships.

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 Self Confidence

   Grace Chatting

written by Grace \\ tags: Law of Attraction;John Assaraf;Relationships; Marriage

If you are interested in finding out more about Relationship Mastery, sign up for my Free Ebook NOW!

grace@relationshipacademy.co.uk

written by Grace \\ tags: Divorce, love, marriage, Relationships; Dating

In our roles as Life and Relationship Coaches, for many years now Alan and myself have come across scores of men and women in their mid 30s – 40s who are single and don’t want to be. Mostly they are really attractive fairly successful and eligible people and they are at a stage in life when they want to have a life partner, a home and a family.They just don’t seem to be able to find a suitable partner anywhere.

Many start to feel quite lonely and despairing, especially the women whose biological clock is ticking away. Men also get concerned because they want to still be young enough to be a friend to their teenage offspring. This can be the start of a vicious cycle. These feelings of hopelessness and loneliness tend to be unattractive to potential partners and give out messages of neediness, which is off putting.

There is no doubt that if you find yourself still single after mid 30s, most of your friends have moved on, married and perhaps had children, and you may be out of the loop as far as relationships go.

You may have been in a long term relationship  which has ended, and now find yourself newly single. It’s difficult to find networks of people who are necessarily your type. As a young adult you could easily meet potential dates or partners in clubs, bars, nightclubs and parties , or at college or university. As you get older, those avenues are not so available or appropriate. So, what do you do?

Online/Offline Dating

Many people are now meeting online and after kissing a few frogs are fortunate enough to find a prince/ss. Whilst this may be a way of meeting people, there is something of a skill to writing profiles for dating sites, and not everyone can present themselves attractively online.

People, especially women worry that they may not be able to trust people that they meet online, but the same arguments could be raised for meeting someone anywhere. There is always a need to be discerning about who you enter into a relationship with no matter where you meet them. Often (but not always) the most reliable prospects are people who are introduced to you by someone you know.

The Good News

I have organised a day which I am calling Making New Connections Cafe  http://makingnewconnections.eventbrite.com for many of these folk to be able to meet each other. The day will be in the World Cafe style http://www.theworldcafe.com. These days are relaxed and great fun, and consist of breaking down into small groups of people having interesting and stimulating conversations around a number of small tables, which they move around, so everyone has a chance to meet everyone else.

I shall pose questions for each conversation to focus on, so people won’t be wondering what to talk about. This kind of gathering helps those who have been single for some time to get right into conversations with lots of new people and to get comfortable with that. It is a way of getting out of your comfort zone… comfortably!

Invitation

It seems to me that most single people go about pretending they aren’t really bothered about being single, when they are. They put up a front. This is not helpful, it sends mixed messages.

I invite you all now, to come out of the closet and come along to my Making New Connections day http://makingnewconnections.eventbrite.com and allow me to introduce you to lots of new and interesting people and share a buffet lunch with us all.

If you really want to push the boat out, why not come along to the 2 day Singles Workshop in the west of Ireland http://www.burrenlifebalance.com/

Grace Chatting, located in Plymouth, UK, is a Transformation and Relationship coach, writer, and workshop facilitator.  She is also a Family Mediator and Psychotherapist.  Her passion is empowerment arising from personal growth, integrity and authenticity.

Grace can be found on her blog www.gracechatting.com; http://twitter.com@GraceChatting/

http://www.linkedin.com/in/GraceChatting http://facebook.com/GraceChatting

Email grace@gracechatting.com

Grace can be reached on (44) 07816491165 if you wish to arrange a consultation

written by Grace \\ tags: Dating; Singles; Grace Chatting; Burren Life Balance;

As a Relationship Coach I  see many people who are seeking to find a partner in the hope that it will make them happy. What I want them to understand is that, to find happiness, they need to build a good relationship with themselves first; love and esteem themselves; then they will naturally attract   a partner without having to try  too hard.

Here is a poem written by the great Virginia Satir. If you want to build your self-esteem, I suggest you read it every

                                       I AM ME

                                 by Virginia Satir

In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me
Everything that comes out of me is authentically me
Because I alone chose it - I own everything about me
My body, my feelings, my mouth, my voice, all my actions,
Whether they be to others or to myself - I own my fantasies,
My dreams, my hopes, my fears - I own all my triumphs and
Successes, all my failures and mistakes Because I own all of
Me, I can become intimately acquainted with me - by so doing
I can love me and be friendly with me in all my parts - I know
There are aspects about myself that puzzle me, and other
Aspects that I do not know - but as long as I am
Friendly and loving to myself, I can courageously
And hopefully look for solutions to the puzzles
And for ways to find out more about me - However I
Look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever
I think and feel at a given moment in time is authentically
Me - If later some parts of how I looked, sounded, thought
And felt turn out to be unfitting, I can discard that which is
Unfitting, keep the rest, and invent something new for that
Which I discarded - I can see, hear, feel, think, say, and do
I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be
Productive to make sense and order out of the world of
People and things outside of me - I own me, and
therefore I can engineer me - I am me and 
I AM OKAY

© Virginia Satir, 1975.
Found in Virginia Satir, Self Esteem, Celestial Arts: California, 1975.

Grace Chatting, located in Plymouth, UK, is a Transformation and Relationship coach, writer, and workshop facilitator.  She is also a Family Mediator and Psychotherapist.  Her passion is empowerment arising from personal growth, integrity and authenticity.

Grace can be found on her blog www.gracechatting.com; http://twitter.com/GraceChatting/ http://www.linkedin.com/in/GraceChatting http://facebook.com/GraceChatting

Grace can be reached on (44) 07816491165 if you wish you arrange a consultation

written by Grace \\ tags: relationship; happiness; Virginia Satir; Grace Chatting;; I am me; self-esteem

By Grace Chatting

My recent posts on how the Law of Attraction affects relationships has covered a lot of information, but I hope it has helped you see much more clearly how to attract that special someone into your life.

Now I want to explore the concept of living FROM the reality you want to attract. In this case living from the reality of already having your perfect partner in your life. 

One powerful way to work with the Law of Attraction is consciously being the person who has what you want. We’ve already discussed doing this on a physical level by being the person your perfect partner would want to be with, and engaging in the activities that your perfect partner would also be likely to engage in.

I am referring more to your mental and emotional state as you go about your daily activities. Are you thinking, feeling and acting like a person who already has their perfect partnership?

Or are you constantly focusing on how lonely and isolated you feel? Do you gaze jealously at other couples, wondering impatiently where your partner is? Do you feel sorry for yourself when you hear love songs on the radio or watch a romantic movie?

 All of these things are sure to keep you living from the perspective of NOT having the relationship you desire! If you turn this around, you are much more likely to attract what you want.

Creating The Conditions

• Create a network of friends and a full life for yourself .
• Be sociable and hospitable. Start a book club or cinema circle.
• Invite people to your home regularly. Not to moan or chit chat, but to engage in growth enhancing conversations.
• Beginning immediately, give your best effort to thinking, feeling and acting like a person who is involved in a loving, committed relationship. How would you look, walk and behave? Try it.
• Conjure up the feeling of being loved, cherished, happy, and secure. If you can’t, see a therapist.
• Be happy for other couples when you see them because you know the joy of feeling connected and intimate with a significant other.
• When you watch romantic movies or hear love songs on the radio, let your heart lift with joy and gratitude for the way they inspire you.
• Affirm as often as possible that your perfect partner is already here and will enter your life at the perfect time. Feel grateful and happy about it because you KNOW it’s true!

What You Can Do

That’s as far as your thoughts and emotions are concerned, but living from your perfect partnership also involves taking the actions that you would take if you were already involved.

Would you eat in nice restaurants? Would you take long, leisurely walks on the beach? Would you go out dancing or cycling?

Whatever activities you picture yourself doing with a lover, begin doing them yourself! If it makes you too uncomfortable to do them alone, ask a friend or family member to join you.

The more time you spend living FROM the perspective of your new reality, the more quickly and easily your current reality will shift to include the things you really want.

Attracting your perfect partner is no different than attracting anything else you want. Simply get clear about what you want, make room for it, and focus your thoughts, feelings, beliefs and activities in such a way that pulls it right into your life.

If you are interested in attending a workshop or residential week or weekend course on Relationships, in the UK or in Spain please contact me.

         Be Happy

              Grace

http://Twitter.com/GraceChatting

www.thebarefoottherapist.com

written by Grace \\ tags: Grace Chatting;Law of Attraction;Relationships;Limiting beliefs